Mysore? Dirty Place!

Before I recount the following story, I have to declare that I bear no animosity towards my countrymen, whichever part of the country they come from. I have always been a bonglo-phile (to coin a term?) so much so that I even learnt the script and can still read a little. As for Bihar and Biharis, I have excellent memories of the friends I made there and later too. This story is just an incident that gives, hopefully, some insight into human nature - nothing more, if anything, a lot less. I hope it makes even Bengalis and Biharis who read this smile, indulgently.

It was the winter of 1979. I was living and working in Ranchi. I had been to Calcutta on work. I was returning to Ranchi by the night bus.

A Bengali old man sat next to me and the bus made its way out of Calcutta. The old man started a conversation with me. Typical bus conversation: “where are you going?” “When did you come to Calcutta?” And then, “Where are you from?”

I said that I was from Mysore. “Mussoorie?” was the query. I did not fit a “North Indian’s” (For South Indians anything other than the four southern sates is North India, even Maharashtra!!) concept of a South Indian and hence this was quite a common confusion. “No, no, Mysore, not Mussoorie”.

“Ah! Maishore. Darty plesh” Translating from Bonglish to English, it is “Ah! Mysore! Dirty place”.

This was news to me, who had lived almost all his life in Mysore. Like most Mysoreans, I too believed (and still do) that it was (is) heaven on earth. Now, here comes a man in impeccable white dhoti and kurta (Punjabi, as the Bengalis call it!) from dirty Calcutta and calls Mysore dirty?

I am not very quick when it comes to trading insults in earnest. It is something else when it is good friendly leg pulling. But, this was different. Stung by this undeserved insult to my beloved city, I was inspired.

I asked innocently, “when were you there?” He said, “During Dusshera”.

I was quick in my response. “Oh, Dasara? That is not the time to visit Mysore. It is always a clean city but, during Dasara all kinds of people, you know, like Bengalis and Biharis come to Mysore and make it dirty.”

End of conversation.